Sunday, January 6, 2019

Being more present and the hope for Spring

The last two days we have rejoiced in 60 degree sunshine pouring into the corners of our home, warming our hearts with the hope of nice weather in our future.
I think I laughed out loud earlier when I heard someone say, "I better water my mud, it's looking a little dry." We have seriously had the wettest year that I can ever remember and my hope for this year is lots of beautiful sunny days that we can embellish in and a little less rain. My back yard is a giant depressing mud slide and with the lack of any snowy days, I've given up the hope for sleighing and have went strait to the desire for Spring and warm weather.

The last couple years I find myself here in this little space, skipping across the keyboard around the new year; perhaps in hopes to start blogging more regularly. Since I know trying to blog on a regular basis is a somewhat difficult task, I'm just going to try and be content in blogging every January.

January is a slow month for us. A lot of time for reading, eating and puzzles. My business is slow and extra curricular activities are rare, so I love January and getting to slow down and be more present. It has quickly become one of my very favorite months and there is so much time for dreaming and planning for the months to come.

Present [prez-uhnt] adjective 1. being, existing, or occurring at this time, or now; current
2. At this time; at hand; immediate

My word for this year is "present!" Last year I chose the word still and I loved seeing how it immensely made such an impact when applying it to every day. Choosing to eliminate the noise and learning to say no to it brought a sense of peace and assurance in my life. There was much more rejoicing than sorrow, so much more feeling and giving Thanks, then feeling discontent, much more feeling close to the ones I loved and less feeling disconnected from everything and everyone.
I love prayerfully choosing a word every year. This year my word is present. I want to put my computer and phone down and be more intentional. I want to play games, and take walks. I want to go on scavenger hunts and teach my little guys how to cook. I want to read books and have more than a handful of valuable conversations with my husband. I want to be present in my relationships and with God! I want to give Him my time and attention and this verse is really ringing truth in my journey to being more present. Such wonderful things that God reminds us to think on, as well as things to not worry about!



Praying that everyone has the most wonderful year this year, filled with blessings and fun memories! Happy 2019!!



Thursday, January 4, 2018

Christmas & New Years


We are four days into the new year and I still can't stop day dreaming over how wonderful Christmas was. I've been listening to this song on repeat, and it has my mind completely wrapped around the thought of Jesus coming as a baby to save us and one day, Oh, how I can not wait for that one day, when he will return once again! Can you believe it?!
Christmas was magical this year in so many ways! My babies, another year older really got into all of the Holiday traditions with me. We baked lots of cakes and cookies, sang Happy birthday to Jesus, did a lesson on the Candy Cane; something I love doing with them because it is such a precious reminder of why we celebrate Christmas to begin with. We read lots of adorable Christmas books, watched fun Christmas movies, drank entirely too much hot chocolate with entirely too many marsh mellows, wrapped Christmas gifts, took a drive out to see the lights, watched ice skating at the Courthouse square and colored pretty pictures of baby Jesus in a manger. Each picture was drawn and colored by three extremely different perspectives and that is one thing I love about my boys so much, is how unique they are. How fearfully and wonderfully they are made.
With the new year already welcoming itself right into our homes, I have spent the last few days reflecting on things that I would like to accomplish, and habits I would like to break and make this year. Last year I made a resolution to complete a one year devotion with the boys. This year I got a new devotion book for them and I am super excited to start another year of devotions with them. I love this one because it also emphasizes the importance of prayer and teaches them how to have a prayerful life and relationship with God. <3
My second resolution is to do my best to stay healthy and start running again! I've already looked up 5 and 10Ks to do this Spring and I've been irritating my husband to death over the Whole 30 cook book that I am itching to purchase and begin as soon as I can get my hands on it. Being healthy is definitely a lifestyle change, and I wouldn't say we live a very unhealthy lifestyle, we rarely eat fast food and I don't buy a lot of sweets, but I definitely want to explore and learn how to cook different healthy meals so we don't get too bored and find ourselves with unhealthy eating habits. It's something I am and have always been passionate about and to pass this lifestyle down to my kids is extra important to me!

And my last resolution, but certainly not least is to be STILL more! To slow down and enjoy a simple, slow pace life. Last year I feel as if my mind was constantly weighed down with so much stress, anxiety, to do lists, deadlines, and errands that I sometimes couldn't think strait. My family came second far too often than not and instead of being present for all of those moments and weekends of just us, my mind wandered about things that were left undone. I don't want to be that mom who is stuck on her computer all day while her kids are begging for attention. I want to be present and involved in every way and in every form and this year I have decided to slow down immensely with photography and ONLY commit to things I am passionate about. I think many of you moms out there can relate to life's constant tugs that keep us always on our feet.
I'm going to really be focusing on this verse all year long and bringing it to life in my every day!
           
                                                         .................................................


A few other things that are on my to do list for this year:
-organize our small house. I have lots of pinterest worthy ideas brewing and I am super excited to make our space a more liveable, organized and inviting space!
-Plan a trip to California to visit my dad and Papa and family! I have a dream of driving across country and pit stopping in Aurora, Co to visit my cousins, then wandering around Moab, UT and hiking the red rocks, scooting over to the grand canyon, because...let's just be honest, who hasnt ever wanted to see the grand canyon in person!? Then we would meet grandpa at Dinsey Land and then head on up to Anderson! The boys are ants in your pants excited, but I am just hoping a trip like this will work out!
-Complete my first 10K...I've not ran a 10K in so long, I'm extremely nervous to attempt a long run like this, so lots of training is in my near future.
-Spending lots of time at home playing around the yard, feeding the chickens, picking flowers and splashing in the creek, and venturing to the lake, camping, swimming and rope swinging!
-Reading mounds of books! Something I love to do, but never seem to have enough time to actually finish in a timely matter.
-And of course, take more pictures of my babies and capturing those treasured, in between moments that are a lasting imprint on our minds and hearts.

Here are a few of those: 


Hanging the pretty garland the boys helped me make


a picture in all of their pajamas...some of us do not like pajamas..apparently!


Raise your hand if you think I'm cute!


The little Tuckers will forever have my heart <3


Christmas cookie making with my littles


In between all of the Christmas ruckus, my Ash lost his front tooth!


Austin loved posing in front of the Christmas tree, almost as if he knew he was prettiest twinkle of them all..



The kiddos out in their FIRST snow day of the year and how magical it was!






Happy New year everyone!

Thursday, July 20, 2017

A Heart Overflowed



Agape:

[ah-gah-pey, ah-guh-pey, ag-uh-] 

nounplural agapae 
 [ah-gah-pahy, ah-guh-pahy, -pee] (Show IPA), 
agapai 
 [ah-gah-pahy, ah-guh-pahy] (Show IPA), 
for 4.

1.
the love of God or Christ for humankind.
2.
the love of Christians for other persons, corresponding to the love ofGod for humankind.
3.
unselfish love of one person for another without sexual implications;brotherly love.
4.
love feast (defs 1, 2).


The 6 am sun burst has peeked over the hills, spilling into our home and kissing my cheeks a good morning. The smell of coffee and the fields full of 4 O'clocks have me in a chipper mood, that and reading this verse over and over again, hiding it's truth in my heart for the day ahead:

"If you keep my commandments you will abide in My Love, just as I have kept My Father's commandments and abide in His Love." -John 15:10

The thing about God's love is it is no ordinary Love; it is Agape Love!  It is not a feeling; it's a motivation for action that we are free to choose or reject. Agape is a sacrificial love that voluntarily suffers inconvenience, discomfort, and even death for the benefit of another without expecting anything in return. We are called to agape love through Christ's example: "Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God" (Ephesians 5:1-2).



We are to agapao God (Matthew 22:37), our neighbor (Matthew 22:39), and even our enemies (Matthew 5:43-46). We are not to agapao money (Matthew 6:24), darkness (John 3:19), or men's approval (John 12:43).

The New Testament has over two-hundred references to agape love. Here are a few.

Matthew 24:12: With increased lawlessness in the end times, concern and caring for others will fade.

Luke 11:42: The legalism of the Pharisees, even their sacrifices, did not reflect a love of God.

John 13:35: The Christian life is characterized by sacrificial agape love.

John 15:9-10Romans 13:10: When we agape love God, we show it by obeying His commandments because His commandments teach us how to love others.

John 15:13: The greatest demonstration of love anyone can give is to die for his friends.

John 17:26Romans 5:5Galatians 5:22Agape love comes from God, not our own effort.

Romans 5:8Revelation 1:5: It was agape love that caused Jesus to sacrifice Himself for us.
e love God if we don't obey Him. It is impossible to love God while ignoring what He says. The two are inextricably connected, as Galatians 5:14 says: "For the whole law is fulfilled in one word: 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself.'"
Romans 14:151 Corinthians 8:1: It is not loving to lead another into sin.

Colossians 3:19: Men are called to show agape love to their wives.

James 1:122:5: Love of God will result in rewards in heaven.

2 Peter 2:151 John 2:15: It is possible to sacrificially love something that is not godly.

Although 1 Corinthians 13 is known as the chapter on love, there is no book that speaks more about agape than 1 John. Two important themes come out of 1 John. The first is that it is inconsistent and false to claim we agape love God while not agape loving other believers. We cannot love God without loving brothers and sisters who also love Him. The second is that it is inconsistent and false to claim we agape love God if we don't obey Him. It is impossible to love God while ignoring what He says. The two are inextricably connected, as Galatians 5:14 says: "For the whole law is fulfilled in one word: 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself.'"

Source

Oh dear Lord I pray that you fill my heart with Agape love for you and your commandments. That you weed out any idols in my life that are choking out the Love for you and your children. I pray with a discerning heart to see your Word to it's fullest potential, that my heart is a mirror image of yours! 
That my life is a "Love Feast" For you dear Lord! In Jesus' Name!



Speaking of Love, my oldest son, Noah recently received the Holy Ghost a Jr Camp with our church and was baptized two weeks later in Jesus' Name!

My heart has been singing in praise for this answered prayer of mine that I have been praying since he was just a few weeks old in my tummy! We celebrated by enjoying  ice cream, singing to our favorite songs, and praying together a prayer that was prayed with me when I got saved!


Oh Noah, the hopes that I hope for you, the dreams that I dream for you; in Christ, they are that you hold steadfast to His love, His Word and His promises and His Blessings will be exceedingly abundant to you my dear, precious son.
Ephesians 3:20-21


+++++++



In other news my precious girl has been growing like a little dahlia! Her legs are so long I feel that when I pick her up they cover my entire body! She is beginning to talk so much and express herself in ways that are so clever, for instance, yesterday while reading a little golden book called, Baby's House she was pointing at the the baby getting in the tub and then slides down from my lap and scurries into my bathroom where her and Austin usually have a bath every night. She runs up to the tub and grabs, then turns to me and says baaa "bath." 

A smart little cookie I tell ya and I exclaim to her father over the phone and we both nod in agreement of her being borderline genius perhaps! (hehe)




She also loves taking up Kitchen play, ever since her daddy put her adorable pink vintage kitchen together she has been banging the pots and the pans and testing out the shuttings of the refrigerator door and oven...it is the cutest sight to see her in her own little mini kitchen.


And one last thing she seems to love to do, as seen by example, is petting and talking to all of the beautiful blooming flowers this Summer. Our favorites being the sunflowers who stand tall and proud at 8 and 9 feet tall. I cut a few smalls ones to gift to our pastors wife for her birthday and I gently caressed the pedals and said, "pretty yellow sunflower, Aslynn" and her little fingers gently touch the tips of the powdery, yellow flower as opposed to batting every other thing she comes into contact with, so I will encourage her and say "Good girl! Gentle.." and in return I am rewarded with the cutest dimples and three toothed smile. 



Thursday, July 13, 2017

A Morning Over Pancakes, Flowers and a Lap Full of Toddlers



As I sit here at my desk with the early morning sun on my face, warm coffee and eggs + strawberries steaming hot; my two year old helping himself to my our breakfast, while Aslynn lay curled up in my lap trying to wake, I seen a tiny window to jot a few thoughts down before the day unfolds it's heaping to do lists. 
Pancakes are on the table for the boys adorned by all of the beautiful flowers that my seven year old picked for me yesterday. If there is one thing Asher loves most that I am sure about, it is seeing my reaction to his next find. 
His heart so soft and selfless, encourages me to want to strive for such a kindness.
Something else I am feeling quite anxious for: time.

Each day is fleeting more so than the one before and the hours just wisp on by. I lay my head down at night and I am still trying to catch my breath. My anxiousness is a sure sign for me to start slowing down and manage my time a little better.

I want to be able to read more than one book with my little ones. I want to be able to help Noah with a math problem, and enjoy a day at the creek without being burdened about what I didn't finish at home. I want to be able to sit and have a full conversation with my husband without my mind wandering. I want to be a part of our church more, and put more time into the friendships I have and cherish.

The Photography business has much to do with the consumption of time as I took on without realizing, 7 weddings this Spring and nearly two session a week every week!

Seven is a bit too much and has drawn me to my computer all of hours of the day.

I have been forcing myself to step away and take mini breaths, enjoy small moments with my kiddos, cuddle, make dinner, sweep the floor, swim.

However, after finishing wedding number five, I have come to the harsh conclusion that my sacrifice is going to have to come from taking pictures. 
I love capturing beautiful images for people, but I don't want this precious season of life to skim away while I am editing picture after picture.

I want to be a part of every milestone, every achievement, accomplishment, new discovery and the list is infinite!

My children will be adults before I have time to really blink an eye, and how regretful I know I will be, if I didn't take the time to really relish in their littleness, their innocence, their childhood.

I won't be able to photograph maybe two weddings a year and two sessions a month.
I think that is the minimization that I desperately need to feel congruent with my family. 

I have made so many wonderful friendships through this small business of mine, and I hope to be able to still photograph most of the families I have had an acquaintance with! But I only get one shot at this whole mothering jig, and I want to savor in the sweetness of it all. Being a mother is the greatest blessing, how sheepish to think I missed out on the most imperative highlights of their childhood.







Wednesday, July 12, 2017

Of Celebrations, Treasured Memories and a touch of pink

So far it has been a busy Spring which has habitually carried over into Summer.
Lately I have felt the need to press pause more often than not, for the days just come and go and now seem like only a blur.

Because of so much going on this year, we were about a month short in celebrating Aslynn's first birthday. However, it was nothing short of magnificent; everything pink and girly and quaint. She'll never remember, but it is a treasured memory for all those who love her dearly that will tuck it deeply in the corners of their heart in celebration of praising a happy + joyous milestone. 
It has truly been a remarkable year; one that we'll hold on to in the years to come!











Wednesday, June 14, 2017

A Morning Over Pancakes, Flowers and a Lap Full of Toddlers


It's been a year of wonderful, of grace, of a mirror image of his love for his children; a year of sunshine, of happiness, of milestones and firsts; it's been a year of tears and laughter, of growing, changing and discovering. It's been a year since my little peanut was born and she is beautiful, sensitive, loving and everything I always hoped for in a little girl.

Aslynn Tatum, you are one!














She is especially fond of her brothers, as they love to love and hold and protect her. They talk to her just like a baby would want to be talked to. She loves to walk around and discover things by trying them in her mouth. It is an ongoing effort to keep the floors clean on both of our ends.

She has two bottom teeth and two more that are making their grand appearance on top, though I doubt she finds them to be anything but grand, as it has caused lots of comfortableness, fussiness and sleepless nights for both her, myself and dad.
She loves to clap and sing, and will dance on cue. She loves be tickled especially this little piggy.

She squeals a tiny squeal every time daddy walks in the door from being on the road, but then soon after, she is looking for me. <3

I love her dimples and smile. I love how when she does smile, her eyes smile as well, and her pig tails give her that extra little spunk of girly-ness. I love her demeanor and how dainty and elegant she is.

I have found my heart to be so full this past year with Aslynn a part of our family. My love for her is so eminent, I often find it hard to imagine a time when I didn't love her...I don't think there is one. 

It is different having a girl after four boys for she has needs they never had, and she has a sensitivity about her, that the boys did not ever acquire. It's new and beautiful and wonderful and even indescribable, and am filled with elation just thinking about the years to come and this precious gift that God has bestowed on our sweet family. 




Tuesday, March 22, 2016

Happy Spring & Happy Third Trimester!



Only three more months and we get to meet this sweet little baby girl!
I can not wait to see and hold her and to soak up every moment of newness that will come with her arrival. 

I am a little nervous for Austin and how he will do as far as adjusting to all the changes that are about to take place, but I hope that he transitions well.
It has become a lot easier with the big boys being older, to distribute my attention to them equally. I try to make sure that I do things with ALL of them, as well as finding those little moments in between with each of them.
The boys are so forgiving when I lack in that area and I look for those special opportunities for one on one time with each of them so that I can sit and talk, or read, or answer questions, or help with a puzzle, tie a shoe, fix a boo boo.
I want to make sure that I always make time for those special moments and not brush them off because I was too busy, or the baby was crying, or I just didn't feel like taking the time.

I have a lot of special memories as a child growing up and I desperately want those same memories for my boys.
It's a day to day challenge and it's not easy! I find myself asking my kids for forgiveness often, but am so thankful for God's grace and my children's forgiving hearts.

With this little girl in the mix I feel like we will all dote on her.
I feel like the boys will be proud big brothers and protectors and I love making them feel special about this blessing that God has placed in their lives. 

I told Noah the other day, "God is giving you a great privilege and responsibility by giving you a baby sister. He must think you will make a great protector and example to her. That you'll show her what true kindness and compassion looks like in the hearts of men." He beamed with pride and says, "I know it! I will definitely protect her and show her all sorts of things."

Made this momma's heart melt into a big puddle.