Happy Spring & Happy Third Trimester!

Only three more months and we get to meet this sweet little baby girl!

I can not wait to see and hold her and to soak up every moment of newness that will come with her arrival. 

I am a little nervous for Austin and how he will do as far as adjusting to all the changes that are about to take place, but I hope that he transitions well.

It has become a lot easier with the big boys being older, to distribute my attention to them equally. I try to make sure that I do things with ALL of them, as well as finding those little moments in between with each of them.

The boys are so forgiving when I lack in that area and I look for those special opportunities for one on one time with each of them so that I can sit and talk, or read, or answer questions, or help with a puzzle, tie a shoe, fix a boo boo.

I want to make sure that I always make time for those special moments and not brush them off because I was too busy, or the baby was crying, or I just didn't feel like taking the time.

I have a lot of special memories as a child growing up and I desperately want those same memories for my boys.

It's a day to day challenge and it's not easy! I find myself asking my kids for forgiveness often, but am so thankful for God's grace and my children's forgiving hearts.

With this little girl in the mix I feel like we will all dote on her.

I feel like the boys will be proud big brothers and protectors and I love making them feel special about this blessing that God has placed in their lives. 

I told Noah the other day, "God is giving you a great privilege and responsibility by giving you a baby sister. He must think you will make a great protector and example to her. That you'll show her what true kindness and compassion looks like in the hearts of men." He beamed with pride and says, "I know it! I will definitely protect her and show her all sorts of things."

Made this momma's heart melt into a big puddle.

These Treasured Days

"Mother, you are not wasting your life in your home. God says that children are at the very center of life in the kingdom of God. When you take time to hold a little one on your lap, you are wielding a mighty power. You are in the perfect will of God. You are not only doing something good...you are doing what is best. You are in the very center of God's heart." N. Campbell

These warmer days we've been having, definitely keep us outside a lot more! 

It really feels so nice to feel 70 degree weather and sunshine on your face. The one thing I know I have been doing a lot more is taking walks and taking pictures!

These photos turned out a little more fallesh looking, but I am sure when things begin to turn green it will look much more like Spring!

I have loved being able to take more photos of my boys this year, so far. Last year it was a little difficult finding the energy to get out and take the time, but this pregnancy has me feeling so much more energetic that I wake up and am ready to go and hate to see the day come to an end.

I am sure when the third trimester rolls around I will start feeling that exhaustion once again, but for now I am so enjoying this season of life and this pregnancy.

I don't want to miss opportunities in the midst of  life to make memories as well as photograph memories and moments of my babies.

They are growing so much it saddens me!

And I don't want to miss opportunities to, in a way, document this pregnancy.

I feel rather large and am not a very confident person with my self esteem, but I think pregnancy is a beautiful thing and such a wonderful gift from God that I am willing to put aside my insecurities, for I know I will thank myself later when they are all grown up and older and starting families of their own.

I definitely don't want to forget about these treasured days of mine.

You Were Born..

..And the world was a more beautiful place!

Today is Asher Ellis' birthday.You are six little man! At 3:31 today you entered the world and made it a more beautiful place. You have been your mommy's little sidekick ever since and each day I fall more and more in love with you and your spunky personality.

You say you want to be a police officer when you grow up, even though what I think you mean is one of those cowboy texas rangers who rope and ride, but regardless, I think you'd make the best police officer ever! You have the best imagination and can play with anyone at anytime. I love that about you. I love how you are so sweet and caring, you just want to love and be loved.

You still have all of your baby teeth, you can write your name and many other words. You love dinosaurs, anything cowboy and reading books. 

You have the cheekiest grin and the biggest puppy dog eyes, which may or may not be a good thing because you often get your way with things.

My wish for you is that you continue being the awesome, caring and wonderful little person that you are! That you never let the world change or mold you into someone that God didn't intend for you to be. That you always keep Him close to your heart and continue to pray, continue to ask questions, continue to love with all your heart.

My wish is that your mommy can always be a good example for you in showing you what to look for someday in a spouse that you will grow old with. And that daddy can continue being a good example in showing you how to be the best husband and father that you can be.

I believe that you are going to be even more wonderful with every year that God gives me with you.

I love you little man!

I hope today you have the best birthday ever!

This time last year...

This time last year, I was anxiously awaiting the arrival of this little guy, Austin Clay!

It's amazing to me how quick one year can fly by, though there were so many memories made, milestones achieved and experiences that will forever be treasured.

As we embark on turning ONE years old, I wanted to capture each month. I believe that with photographing memories, it's almost, in a way like pushing the pause button on life, even if for a moment. 

This day was nothing but an ordinary Sunday afternoon, but it's special to me because it's a day that God gave us to be thankful for the little things, to love the people around us and to know that we are loved in return. It's special because after today, it is only a memory that we are able to keep in our hearts.

It's never easy watching your little ones turn a year older. With every year they grow, a piece of your heart is left with their littleness that they leave behind, but one thing that keeps my mind at ease is finding the beauty in the midst of our messy, but wonderful life, despite how fast time passes us on by. I like grasping onto those things so that when I am older and my littles are older, I still have those treasures to look back on.

A few things that you are doing now:

Walking!!!

Talking and a lot! I am sure to us it is just jibberesh, but for you it is serious talk!

You have four teeth and LOVE to eat. You're like a little piggy sometimes and you even snort when you laugh.

You wave the cutest little wave with your cute little hand and say "bye bye" 

You look for daddy around the house anytime someone says his name.

You love playing with your brothers and are always right there with them, observing their menacing, perhaps even taking notes.

You are the happiest little guy I know, other than your older brother Asher. You two will be extremely close one day I believe as you are both very loving and humorous and seem to share a lot of common ground for little people.

I don't want to let this littlness of yours go, I wish I could hold on to it for as long as my heart desires, but I know it is God's will for time to march on and as it does, your mommy is right here soaking up all of this sweetness that life has to offer and that God has bestowed.

Happy 11 months baby boy!

::

The Last Bit of Winter + a 24 week Bump

Winter has gone by surprisingly fast for me this year. I am sure that having my husband gone so much, working, leaving me reaching for every weekend, has something to do with it.

I have found myself wishing days and weeks away, but am humbly reminded that even when i am anxious or looking forward to the future, I don't want to wish life away or miss special moments or grace filled blessings because I was too busy wanting time to be over with.

"Each new day brings new adventures! New memories to build, new chances to love and nurture and new opportunities abound, as we create loving atmospheres for our families. The precious moments are lived out right alongside those regular routines.

Every day with it brings with it, the joyful anticipation of surprises, blessings, unforgettable moments and the increase of love. Enjoy the adventurous life in your home today."

-M Kauenhofen

After reading this excerpt today I was greatly encouraged to take a minute and reflect on all the good things to be thankful for in my every day here at home. It is so hard not having my husband here and my heart aches for him while he's gone, but I love having this treasured opportunity to share, teach, instruct and love my littles all the while, watching them grow and change every day.

This life, even the mundane is adventurous and there is so much to be thankful for. There is so much beauty hiding in the corners of these long, exhausting days at home. 

And that is what makes my heart the most happy, is finding that beauty.

Speaking of things to be thankful for, I am so thankful to be having such a wonderful pregnancy with this sweet baby girl.

I am 24 weeks with 16 to go! I can't believe six months of come and gone just like that, but am so thrilled to watch her due date approach along with Spring come into bloom...

So much happiness bottled up in one!

Until next time...

June Can't Come Soon Enough!

So this past week has been a very exciting week for all of us here at the Tucker household.

My husband and I had been keeping a tiny little secret for quite some time. Two months to be exact! It was so hard, but I thought that there was no better way to announce baby #5 than with a pink bow on her head proclaiming we were having a GIRL. 

I wasn't 100% sure that it WAS a girl, however I had a very strong intuition that it could very possibly be for the very fact that this pregnancy so far has been a completely and dramatically different experience for me. 

I haven't been sick at all with the exception of a week where I had light nausea every night.

It quickly faded and I have felt so good and energetic. 

This is how I always imagined pregnancy to be like. When pregnant with the boys, I honestly did not enjoy it at all. The first 4-5 months a sickness took over that would sometimes force me to go to the hospital for fluids. I went through medication after medication in attempt to help with the nausea. Nothing would work.

I felt I had zero energy all the time and could just never get enough sleep. By the time I felt good enough to eat again I would still lack the energy to do anything constructive, including taking care of my body.

I am so thrilled that this LAST pregnancy is treating me so well and leaving me feeling so very good about myself. And yes, this is our last. I definitely thought that Austin would be the baby of the family, but who knew that God had another plan and I am rejoicing with praise to Him for giving me the blessing of getting to experience having a daughter. Something I've always always wanted.

I love my boys SO much,t hey are awesome boys who love their momma and are so kind, smart and unique in their own ways. The older boys are so well behaved and have really grown so much. I have thoroughly enjoyed being their momma and getting to watch them every day change and grow and learn and strive has been such a blessing. Austin is my little baby man and my heart just explodes when I look at him. But I am also looking forward to having a completely different type of relationship with my very own daughter. 

I hope that God instills in me a good heart and mind to teach her and set examples for her as she grows and matures. That God grants wisdom and instruction to Randall to love her and show her what to look for in her future husband.

She will one day become a women like myself and my hope is that in her older years she becomes my best friend as well...like I am with my own mother.

June can not get here quick enough! <3

The Tucker's First Snow Day!

Last night after tucking all the boys in their beds and reading, "God Gave Us You" by Lisa Bergren, per request Asher and flipping through it's wintery wonderland pages, He asked, "Is it going to snow?" Of course the forecast had said we were to get 2-4 inches followed by quite a bit more this Friday, so not to disappoint, I said, "YES! So, when you wake up in the morning, everything will be crystal white and snow will be falling from the sky all morning!"

I felt like it was Christmas all over again and him and Ryder's eyes, like giant blue marbles closed tightly in hopes that the morning would be here when they opened them.

Well, we got our White, Wonderland! Which makes it Austin's first EVER snow! Of course we had to venture out in our warmest and let him analyze and judge it for himself. He was delighted with the sight, and grinned ear to ear, but sitting in it, he was not too happy about. Oh, don't let the first photo below fool you. His attitude toward being abandoned in it quickly changed; bless his little heart. I'll even spare you the attempt at the snow angel photos I captured.

A Winter Wonderland, in pictures...

to be continued...

January 10 on 10

The first few weeks of this new year has brought a lot of cuddling,

hot coffee and lounging in our pajamas.

We got our first snow today as well, so even more reason to stay in and cozy up.

Last year I didn't do so well with keeping up with 10 on 10, but this year am hoping to be able to capture these moments every month.

1. Enjoying coffee in my pajamas and the sunshine on my face at 6 am

2. Baby trying to help make my bed

3. breakfast before church

4. Austin enjoying his very first ever, cinnamon roll

5. Reading over 2 Chronicles 5 from the message at church that morning

6. Noah using me to play Peek-A-Boo with Austin

7. the first snow flakes of the year on our front deck

8. Asher extactic about all the snow

9. Organizing new fabric 

10. Helping the boys put together a 1,000 piece puzzle